WHEN MY MOM PUT ME IN JUNIOR LIFEGUARDS AS A KID

WHEN I ACT LIKE I PERSONALLY KNOW A CELEBRITY

A friend of a friend of the assistant counts…

WHEN THE WAITER SUGGESTS SOMETHING FROM THE LOW CAL MENU

WHEN WE STOP IN BISHOP ON OUR WAY TO MAMMOTH

WHEN SOMEONE TRIES TO ARGUE THAT THEY NEED FOUR SEASONS

I’m like…